VIR-III-0012
“I've been blaming others for something that was partly my fault.”
Blame is comfortable because it gives you somewhere to put the discomfort. But as long as you're focused on their part, you can't learn anything from your part. Owning your contribution doesn't mean absolving anyone else — it just means being accurate about yourself.
Your Practice
Write down the situation and draw two columns: what they contributed, and what you contributed. Be as honest in the second column as you are tempted to be in the first. Then ask: what would I do differently, given only the column I control?
The Architects
“The first step: don't be anxious. Nature controls it all.”
— Marcus Aurelius, Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 8.5 (Gregory Hays translation, 2002)