APX-IV-0068
“I won big and I'm refusing to feel guilty about being proud of it.”
Somewhere you learned that pride is dangerous, so you smother every win in guilt. But guilt over an honest victory is not humility, it is shrinking. You can be grateful and proud at once. Let the win be a win. The people who love you want to see you stand tall in it.
Your Practice
- Name the guilt for what it is: a habit of making yourself smaller.
- Separate gratitude from guilt. Be grateful for help; proud of your work.
- Tell one person you're proud, and let them be proud with you.
- Mark the win somewhere you'll see it. Strength deserves a record.
The Architects
“Self-control is the chief element in self-respect, and respect of self, in turn, is the chief element in courage.”
Thucydides, History of the Peloponnesian War, Book 1.84 (speech of the Spartan king Archidamus), Charles Forster Smith translation, Loeb Classical Library (1919)